Marriage: A Personal Observation

Opponents of same-sex marriage accuse legislators and judges of "redefining marriage", but in my personal experience marriage is a reflection of the intimacy a couple has achieved, not a definition of what that couple is. Marriage doesn't hold families together or make people better parents or bring couples closer; the high rates of divorce attest to that. Rather, when a couple have reached a point where they realize that their lives depend on each other and will forever, they decide to recognize that publicly by being wed. My parents were married for 34 years, not because of a certificate or a wedding ceremony, but because every day they made that decision to continue their relationship. Healthy marriage depends on re-affirming that union on a daily basis. Whatever is written in law books or religious texts merely seeks to explain what it is already exists. And so to say that anyone could re-define marriage misses the point. Many same-sex couples have reached that point of intimacy whether or not it's legally recognized, and they merely want to express it like anyone else, in a marriage. To refuse to recognize that, to exclude a couple that has already bound their lives together due to your own moral beliefs, is the redefinition. In our country today, marriage is no longer a reflection of the intimacy between to people; it's a political tool used to oppress those we disagree with.